Counting Down ... Day 148

Can it already be New Year’s Eve? What happened to 2010? Is it already time to countdown to the dawn of 2011?

Yes, it is time to welcome 2011, and as we do I will be starting another countdown. It is 31 days long and it will mark the end of TJ’s deployment. Just as when he was a boy, I find myself wondering where the time has gone. It seems like it was just yesterday when I began this blog and suddenly I’m ready to start the countdown for his final month in Kuwait.

We spoke with TJ on Christmas day. He talked about so many things. Most of all he talked about his current plans for his military future. About two months ago he had said he just didn’t know which way to go. As he has talked with various commanders there on base, it seems he has found clarity and direction. We are so stinkin’ proud of him and how he does this whenever he faces a major decision.

He continues to love his deployment and I know he would stay if they would let him. They have used TJ and his abilities. They’ve challenged him and he has stepped up to the challenge and thrived in it. For this, he has been coined by four different people, including a General! [Note: To be coined is a tremendous honor for an Airman and done only when a higher ranking officer observes service that is exemplary. For TJ to have received this honor four times over is outstanding!]

Thirty-one more days. I count them down with an excitement, looking forward to his return. For TJ it will be a very bitter-sweet countdown. He loves serving in this way and yet he knows that he must return and start focusing on the plans he has laid out for his future.

What will 2011 bring? No one can answer that with certainty. For this mom, I continue to pray it will bring our son home safely, along with his fellow soldiers who serve to protect our freedoms.  Let the countdown begin! 

Christmas Has Arrived ... Day 141-142

One of my favorite Christmas photos!

The clock has just "struck" midnight in Kuwait. It is Christmas day for TJ.


Merry Christmas, Pal! 


Dad and I love you. We miss you dearly, and we trust you will have a wonderful Christmas day there in the sandbox! 


Ever proud of you, Mom

Christmas in a Flat-Rate Box … Day 139

When the boys were little we never put any presents under the Christmas tree until after they had been put to bed on Christmas Eve. As parents we didn’t want to put the temptation to open their gifts early right out in front of them for even a few days.

And so, once we were assured that TJ and his brother were asleep, we quietly pulled their gifts out from hiding and laid them under the tree. One year their grandparents bought the train that now is a part of our Christmas decorations. Joe and I carefully put it together and placed the other gifts a little off to the side. As we “tested” the train, we hoped that they wouldn’t wake up as it click-clacked around on the track. The following morning we slipped out of bed and down the stairs ahead of the boys. Joe started the train up and then hit the button for its whistle to sound. It was a Hallmark moment if ever there was one! The boys came down the stairs, literally rubbing the sleep from their eyes, to see the Christmas tree lit and all of the presents around it and the train chugging around underneath it all!

I know every parent loves seeing the excitement in their children’s eyes as they see the presents under the Christmas tree for that first time, and I’m no different. I would use as many different colors of wrapping paper to conceal their gifts and loved tying them up with bows. It made everything look more festive and special. I was always amazed at how even the smallest number of gifts seemed to multiply once we put them under the tree.

But this year it is much different. Unlike some military families waiting for their service men and women to return, we won’t put any gifts under the tree to wait until TJ makes it home. Instead we choose to send Christmas to him. We wanted him to have it there on Christmas day.  So, we thought carefully about what was small enough to be brought home in his duffle bag, and we looked for things that he could “consume” before he leaves Kuwait in another month. The final consideration was making everything fit into a flat-rate box from the post office.

TJ's gifts - packaged and ready to go!

When I wrapped his gifts this year I simply used a few rolls of paper that I still had from last year. To make it easier to fit into the box, I didn’t put any bows or ribbon onto any of TJ’s gifts. And, then there was the jigsaw puzzle effort to get everything to fit into the box. I’m still not sure when I learned how to do that but once again, somehow I squeezed everything in and got the box lid to fold down flat! I laid a final piece of wrapping paper over all of the gifts and put one bow on the very top.

All of this took place the very first week of December. Joe took on the task of waiting in line at the post office to mail Christmas to TJ. And, that brings me around to the part about waiting until Christmas morning for the boys to see their gifts. Unfortunately whenever a package is mailed to TJ, we are required to complete a Customs Declaration and Dispatch Note. Each and every item must be listed along with its value. This is then taped to the outside of the shipping box. That was probably the hardest part for me to deal with this year. How could any of it be a surprise for him when he would see all of his gifts listed before he would even open the box?

A few days ago TJ emailed to tell us his box had arrived. He thanked us for everything and said how much he appreciated all of it. That stinker! He didn’t even wait until Christmas morning!

Then yesterday a flat-rate box arrived at our door. It was from TJ! He had sent Christmas to us, just as we had done for him! We had no idea if he’d wrapped the gift(s) that were inside the box. Joe and I pondered if we should open it or just put it under the Christmas tree as it was. And then something caught my eye. It was that crazy Customs Declaration and Dispatch Note! I read, out loud, the list of things our flat-rate box contained and then I reached for the scissors, cut the tape and opened it up!

This year, without waiting for Christmas morning, we’ve exchanged our Christmas gifts to each other through US postal flat-rate boxes. No sleepy-eyed boys coming down from their beds to presents under the tree, not even a lot of fancy wrappings and bows on the gifts. Just two flat-rate boxes crossing the ocean; one going to Kuwait to a soldier far from home, and one making its way home to that soldier’s parents. But within those two boxes more love was exchanged than the largest amount of gifts any Christmas tree ever held beneath its boughs. This year I’ve learned that memories are more precious than ever and Christmas gifts are just as special even if they are concealed within a US postal flat-rate box!

Merry Christmas, TJ! We miss you - and we love you!

Christmas Music … Day 130

There are two things that my family knows very well about me; 1) I love Christmas music, and 2) I am extremely emotional and can become teary-eyed over seemingly nothing. The guys love to tease me about how early in the year I will start listening to my Christmas music. And when the season does get here, they will often say, “do you need some Kleenex, Mom?” when certain Christmas ads come on during a commercial break.

Though I am teased about how early I will start listening to my Christmas music, the love I have for it makes it a very easy and sure gift for anyone wondering what I might like for Christmas. This is exactly what TJ did several years ago when he gave me what was then Josh Groban’s newest album, “Noel”. TJ knew that I like both Josh Groban and Christmas music, so he had a sure thing in that gift, and he hit the mark dead on! I loved the album and played it throughout that day, and the next, and the next and … well, let’s just say it was a gift that has kept on giving many times over!

However, I had to keep my box of Kleenex very close at hand while listening to this album. The third song on the album is “I’ll be Home for Christmas.” It was written by James ‘Kim’ Gannon and was recorded on October 4, 1943 by Bing Crosby. Because the country was in the midst of World War II, the recording rose to number three on the music charts and remained there for eleven consecutive weeks, as it expressed the hearts of so many soldiers and their families. Numerous artists have performed the song since Bing Crosby. But it is the way that Josh Groban has recorded it that has always brought me to tears.

My understanding is that when Josh was working with his recording producer while producing his Christmas album, he asked if it was possible for them to get recordings of actual service men and women sending verbal greetings to their families and then incorporate their greetings into the song.

The song begins with a piano introduction. About two measures into the introduction the voice of Sgt. Patrick Hawkins is heard as he says hello to those back home. His is followed by Specialist Brook Frisk who was serving in Iraq. After their Christmas greetings to their family and friends Josh begins the first verse of the song;

            ‘I am dreaming tonight of a place that I love,

Even more than I usually do.

And although I know it’s a long road back,

I promise you,

I’ll be home for Christmas…’

As the song continues, so do the service men’s and women’s Christmas greetings. At the very end of the song a little girl’s voice gives a message to her daddy. She tells him that they have a special gift for him under their Christmas tree and that it will be waiting for him when he returns home.

The very first time that I listened to this album on that Christmas day several years ago, TJ caught me in the kitchen, wiping my eyes, and he just chuckled. The first time it caught me off-guard, but after that I began doing much better, being able to listen to the song without crying at all! That is, until last year . . .

This is TJ’s fourth Christmas since he enlisted and it is the second one that his service to our country will prevent him from coming home for Christmas. Last year was the first one, and because of that, this song was very difficult for me to get through. However, TJ was state-side and we were able to call him several times throughout the day just to say, ‘hi’. So, even by the time Christmas came, I was doing better with this song.

As TJ serves in Kuwait and his cousin serves in Afghanistan, this song has become “my” song. This is my family singing those lyrics. Both of these young people went to their oversea posts voluntarily, knowing it would take them away from family for Christmas. Beth, our niece, has gone so that others could make it home for Christmas. TJ volunteered because he firmly believes it is necessary for our country’s freedom and for its protection from our newest enemies, the radical terrorist groups.

I am listening to my Christmas music just as much as I have in other years. Yes, it will be a difficult day with TJ in Kuwait, but I know TJ is doing what he believes in and loves so I can stand tall and proud of him. And, as long as I’ve got my box of Kleenex close by - especially while I listen to Josh Groban’s album - I’m enjoying even this very special song. You see, there is a sense in which TJ will be home for Christmas, because he is in our every thought, dream, and prayer.

Merry Christmas, Pal!

We miss you and love you,

Mom and Dad


If you would like to hear Josh Groban's song, "I'll Be Home For Christmas", I encourage you to have your Kleenex ready when you go to the linked site. They have done a fabulous job with a slide show to go along with the song! 

Scrapbooking ... Day 122

I thoroughly enjoy scrapbooking. I did my first scrapbook for some very dear friends in honor of their 50^th wedding anniversary. Upon completion of that book, I was hooked on this new “hobby.”

The following year I captured our oldest son’s birth through high school graduation in my second scrapbook. That scrapbook was followed two years later by one for TJ’s high school graduation. I am thankful to say that both boys are grateful for these books - though I still have them for “safe keeping”.

I believe it was during TJ’s BMT graduation weekend that he asked me if I would make him another scrapbook of his years in the Air Force. It wasn’t that I hadn’t already thought of doing one, but it meant everything to me that he really wanted one. So, if I hadn’t been taking enough pictures during that weekend, his request kept me always looking for “another scrapbook page” opportunity!

During TJ’s first year in the Air Force, I kept busy compiling all sorts of things for this new scrapbook. The schedule from his BMT graduation weekend, the ticket stubs from our flights to and from San Antonio, a pass for coming onto the base during our visit to Malmstrom were among items carefully saved for future pages to capture these events. TJ has assisted in this effort by giving me the letters he received from people during his weeks in BMT, and a pile of letters from a third grade class that made him their pen-pal his first year in the Air Force.

But because I like to use a lot of pictures in my scrapbooks, during his second and third years it became very difficult for me to envision pages that could be done. I would often ask him if he couldn’t PLEASE take more pictures, or have more taken of himself so that I would have something for his scrapbook. Often such requests were received with a hearty sigh, and I could always “see” his eyes roll as he grumbled some excuse about why he didn’t take more pictures.

So, as his Thanksgiving Day began [in Kuwait] I emailed him the following request,

TJ, I have one request ... You will roll your eyes and think this very dumb. But I DON'T care!

PLEASE ...  today is Thanksgiving and a very unique one for you. Please take some pictures of Thanksgiving in Kuwait - military style. I promise you - many years from now, you will thank me, probably on some Thanksgiving Day.  :)

I love you, Pal!  :)

Mom

A few days later about four new pictures appeared on his Facebook page, all of them from Thanksgiving Day! The following day another new picture appeared. In all of these pictures, TJ handed his camera to someone else to take the shot. These pictures not only captured some of the places and things there in Kuwait, but they captured TJ’s smile and the joy that he is experiencing from this deployment.

Though this is not the best example of a typical scrapbook page, the picture to the right is a “page” created in PowerPoint that will be a part of his USAF scrapbook. It is simply titled, “Thanksgiving – Kuwait, 2010”  

It is also a reminder to me to express my gratitude to God that TJ was safe and able to enjoy his Thanksgiving Day with good friends and great food, too!

Thanksgiving Day ... Day 112

Thanksgiving dawned with my mind counting backwards from dinner time, figuring out just when the turkey needed to go in, followed by when to make the potato and bean dishes, etc. Joe had gotten up earlier and made a wonderful breakfast sandwich for me. I love the egg, sausage, cheese sandwiches and this one was made on a homemade biscuit!

As we talked over our plans for the meal and its “timing,” when our friends would arrive, and what all needed to be done, we could not help but wonder, would TJ be able to call home? Both of us had sent him Thanksgiving greetings via email the night before so that when his Thanksgiving Day began our greetings would be waiting for him. We have no idea if this is just another day at work for TJ or if he will be given the day off to celebrate the holiday.

Hanging the flag, Thanksgiving morning, 2010

With breakfast done, I was about to start the next thing on my mental “to-do” list, when I suddenly remembered the flag! Grabbing my coat, I dashed out the door with our American flag. As I neared the poll mount, I allowed the flag to unfurl so that it was waving behind me.

Many may not understand this gesture, but for me, I am not only thankful for my freedom, but thankful for my son, my niece, Beth, (see Cousins … Day 26) and the thousands of others who will not be coming home to Mom’s for dinner today because they are standing guard, defending my freedom. Both TJ and Beth have volunteered for their deployments. Beth left for Afghanistan about two weeks ago. Part of her purpose in going is to relieve others, enabling them to get home for the holidays. I am not just thankful for the sacrifice these two are making, but I am so “stinkin’” proud of them!

Right now, it is time for me to begin the herb-butter rub for our turkey. This year it is just a small three pound turkey breast. TJ may not be sitting at our table today. But, he is not missing! He is very present here at home, always in our hearts, our thoughts, and our prayers.

As I count my blessings today, TJ and his safety for the past 112 days is at the top of my list! 

Facebook ... Day 109

Facebook is a social network service and website that began in February, 2004. It is operated and privately owned by Facebook, Inc, and as of July, 2010, has more than 500 million active users. “Users” of Facebook may create personal profiles, add other users as friends and exchange messages. In January, 2009, one study ranked Facebook as the most used social network by worldwide monthly active users. I am NOT one of them, but both TJ and my husband have their own Facebook pages.

Both of them enjoy connecting [and reconnecting] with people. My husband is now talking to former classmates from his high school days. He hasn’t seen some of them since they graduated more than forty years ago. TJ also keeps up with his friends, his cousins, and his fellow airmen.

A picture TJ posted on his Facebook page from Kuwait.

As I said earlier, I am not on Facebook. I already sit at a computer most of the day at work, and the last thing I want to do when I get home is to sit down at a computer once again. But occasionally, I will sneak into this social network somewhere out there in cyberspace through my husband’s page. I normally do this when he tells me about what somebody else has posted, and I have the desire to see it for myself, or when I want to pull pictures from TJ’s page.

This morning was one of those times. Someone encouraged Facebook users to write thirty things about themselves, post it, and then pass the idea on to thirty other Facebook users. TJ must have decided that he wanted to become one of the links in that chain, so he sat down and cranked out thirty statements about himself. My husband saw it and suggested that I might want to check it out. I began working my way rather quickly through the list, until I came to #25. TJ said, “There is something better then my momma's cooking - my dad’s!  Hee hee”    

Now, I will admit that it has almost become a family joke that I only have about three or four recipes that I’m good with, and after that we go out to eat. To be sure, it is not really that bad, but I am by no means an “Iron Chef!” In fact, TJ is right: His dad can whip up some incredibly awesome dishes when I step out of his way in the kitchen!

I also discovered that as I was reading through TJ’s list, it was as though I was learning things about him through his own eyes. His honesty and transparency, even in creating something like this list, was amazing to me. As I considered some of his observations about himself, I caught myself nodding in agreement and saying to myself, “Yup, that’s TJ alright!” There were also times when I could not help but marvel as I realized he was sharing some of his deepest desires and most private feelings. [For example, I had no idea that he desires to have “an Army of children” someday].

As I quietly and respectfully read his heart, which is really the only way TJ knows to write something like this list, my heart could not help but swell with pride for him. Interestingly, the very first thing he put on his list for others to know about him was, “1. I am severely passionate about loyalty and honesty to my friends.” Nothing could be more accurate about TJ than that statement. He also wrote about his intense passion to serve, “I love the military, but hate my job, only due to the fact that I want to give more.”  

But far more than learning what he desires, or once again seeing how passionate he is about serving in the military, was the immense joy I felt as I read about his faith in the Lord. He wrote three separate statements about his relationship with God:

“I love my life, but had to fight and work to get some of the things I have today; but it was always God that allowed the things to happen the way they did.

“I don’t always do what I should to honor the Lord, but He gives me more grace than I deserve, and always forgives me, His love I will never fully contemplate.

“[I am] saved every day by the grace of God.”

Amen, TJ. Amen.

TJ’s “Super HUA Day” Holiday … Day 98

Today is Veteran’s Day. November 11^th was when the peace treaty that ended World War I was signed. No matter what day of the week November 11^th falls on, it is the day that our country stops to honor those who have sacrificed for our freedoms. As a result, I had the day off work.  Stores held special sales for veterans and restaurants offered free meals to those who have and are serving in the military.

Veteran’s Day probably wasn’t too much different for TJ. There are no Applebee’s on base for him to go to for a free meal. But that is okay with him. You see, TJ has been declaring his own “holiday”. A little more than a week ago he called to tell me it had been “Super HUA Day.” I asked him what that was and he explained that he had proclaimed the day as “Super HUA Day” and went to work in FULL gear. For TJ this is his way of having a holiday when he feels it is needed. It is also his way of having some fun and wearing all of his gear even though it is not required.

TJ's picture of "Super HUA Day"

On Wednesday we received an email from TJ with a picture attached. He was having another “Super HUA Day,” as well as a little bit of fun. I laughed when I saw it. In my mind I could hear him goofing around as he imitated somebody who’d had too much “HOOAH!” I know he was simply having some fun, and probably bringing laughter to those around him.

Although TJ has fun proclaiming “Super HUA Day” I think that deep down inside it is his unique way of recommitting himself to the values he swore to uphold when he took his oath of service; “Integrity first, Service before self, and Excellence in all we do.”  TJ takes that oath very seriously and strives to live out those values everyday when he puts on his uniform. “HUA” simply means he has heard, understood, and acknowledged those values.

Today has been one of a few USA holidays to remind us of our freedom, those who fought for it, and the tremendous sacrifice our military men and women have made and continue to make for that freedom.  TJ is thankful for such holidays. But the one that means the most to him is his own “Super HUA Day.” He will celebrate it as often as he needs to in order to remind and encourage himself to continue serving with integrity, selflessness, and excellence. TJ never wants to give his second best and he never wants to forget for whom he is serving: He serves for each and every one of us!

So, TJ, Super HUA Day to you! May it be a great one!

Halfway There ... Day 93

Today, Saturday, November 6, 2010, is exactly three months since TJ deployed and flew from Norfolk, Virginia to Kuwait. He is halfway through his time in Kuwait. On August 6th, it seemed it would be an eternity with him gone. But today, just as I did when he was a child, I wonder where has the time gone? It is almost hard to believe he has been there for a full three months and that there are only three more to go!
Tomorrow TJ will get up and begin the second-half of his deployment. Keep up the good work, Pal, and be safe! 

A Phone Call from “UNKNOWN” … Day 93

The office where I work was “quiet” yesterday because several of my co-workers were gone. I was working on an assignment from my boss when my cell phone began to vibrate. I reached over and picked it up. It said “Call from UNKNOWN.” My heart quickened and I’m sure I was grinning as I answered it! This caller was not “Unknown”! This message told me TJ was calling!

As we began the conversation, I was able to slip away from my desk and sought the privacy of the conference room in my office. I was so thankful for the “quiet” day!

TJ is doing very well. He told me that he had proclaimed it “Super HUA Day!” and had gone to work in FULL gear: Knee pads, elbow pads, helmet, goggles, gas mask, etc. (If this idea of his makes no sense to you, please go back and read my post titled “Laughter Does Good, Like Medicine … Day 71”.) As he told me about his new “holiday” he said that one of his commanders saw him and just began laughing! It made TJ’s day to bring that kind of joy to someone else’s day. I asked him if anyone had taken a picture of him and he said, “Of course not! Why would they?” (…Well, so much for that scrapbook page!)

TJ continues to excel at his job and to thoroughly enjoy the deployment. One of the commanders recently asked him when his deployment would end. “January 31^st, Sir!” he answered. “Oh, I was hoping you’d be here at least through May,” the commander replied. “I hate the idea of being here without you.” TJ immediately told the commander he would be very willing to have his deployment extended, but they both know that this kind of change is very unlikely. TJ explained to me that for an extension to be granted, his home base would have to permit it - and they most likely would not do that because they insist they are short-handed and really need him back there.

I brought him up-to-date with the things happening here at home with Joe and myself. He said he had received a note from his grandmother, and could I tell her that he appreciated it. And so, the conversation continued. It seemed all too soon when he said he had to go.

After we said good-bye and I returned to my desk, I was so grateful. Just to hear his voice was such an encouragement! To hear the laughter in his voice as he told me about “Super HUA Day,” to catch the excitement he still has just from being there, and to sense the joy he feels in doing what he loves and believes in! It made my heart soar!

Then I thought about the bygone days - actually, not that long ago - when a deployment meant not just months of separation, but usually very slow  (if any) opportunities to communicate with a serviceman overseas. And most certainly, NO phone calls! How blessed we are these days that modern technology enables us to communicate with loved ones that are literally half-way around the world from us, in a time-zone that is ten hours ahead of us, and yet, we talked with each other as if he were standing right outside my office building! How very fortunate we are! How very grateful I am!!

“UNKNOWN”? I don’t think so! It was “Super HUA Day” from my son! 

Trick or Treat ... Day 87

As I prepare to answer the door tonight to the “goblins” who will come to “trick-or-treat,” my mind races back to the days when I walked up and down the block with our boys. I admit – as much as I wanted to do elaborate costumes for the boys - most of the time ours were pretty simple. One year TJ had an orange and black striped shirt. I painted a few stripes on his face, pinned a striped tail on his pants and he was a tiger, even thought he wouldn’t wear the nose piece. One year both of the boys were into Zorro, and so with black pants, shirts, capes, masks, and Grandpa’s homemade swords, they were Zorro!

Halloween fun as Knights

Probably our most elaborate year was when they wanted to be knights. This time we found large pieces of cardboard and created shields and their breastplates. The tricky part was their helmets and face shields. It was our first year homeschooling, including a very intense art class as we worked with papier-mâché over inflated balloons to create them. EVERYTHING got sprayed with silver spray paint. They then added their crests to the front of their shields and they were ready to go! I clearly remember this year because by the time we made it down one side of our block, I was carrying the face shields. By the time we made it up the other side, I was also carrying their hand shields. BEFORE they no longer wanted to wear their helmets or breastplates, I called it quits and we headed for home!

Although we didn’t do trick-or-treating with the boys much past TJ’s fifth birthday, he still played at being different things like a cowboy, and especially an army man. He loved playing with and playing as a “G.I. Joe.” Had I been astute to his love for the military, I might have realized the foreshadowing of his military play, and could have seen ahead to the day he would don a true military uniform.

TJ, who still loves Halloween, sent me pictures of the spooky mask he had set up in his room on base. But it seems that TJ “celebrates” Halloween whenever he feels like it. For example, during his first year, his team had been out checking on the nuclear missiles in their assigned area. When they returned to their off-site base, TJ decided that the humvee was dirty and took it upon himself to wash it. When he was done, he had decided that he was now wearing most of the dirt from the vehicle. Not wanting to waste the opportunity this presented itself in his mind, he put war-paint on his face and began crawling through the grass around the base. I can see him doing it and having the time of his life! That is, until his commander came looking for him. “Lombardi!” he shouted. “What are you doing?” As TJ stood up, he looked at his commander and said, “Playing Rambo, Sir.” I’d love to know what went through that commander’s mind at that moment. Whatever it was, he mustered the strength to simply reply to TJ, “Well, it’s time to stop. Now go clean up.”

Desert Uniform - Just more fun for TJ!

Since then, I’ve received pictures on my mobile phone from TJ with various gas masks on, night vision goggles, and the like. So, getting to go to Kuwait only opened a new door of fun for TJ. While he was training in the Las Vegas area he had a buddy take a picture of him. He was dressed in full desert BDU (battle dress uniform), including the face scarf he can wear for sand storms, along with gloves, helmet, dark sunglasses, his rifle, and a stop sign in Arabic. Those who know TJ, know that he was having the time of his life! And, now, almost a full three months since he deployed, he still loves what he is doing in Kuwait!  From what he tells us, his commanders love having him there on base with them. They see that although he’s a little nutty at times, in TJ’s words, “they know I’m not crazy, I just like to have fun doing my job.”

As Halloween comes to an end, I am sure that TJ found his share of goofy, fun-filled things to do in “the sandbox.” So, enjoy it, Pal, and stay safe! 

Laughter Does Good, Like Medicine … Day 71

Have I mentioned before that TJ has a terrific sense of humor? He loves to laugh and he loves to make people laugh. TJ loves to start a conversation with you using one of his “voices.” When you least expect it, he will suddenly be a salesman, with an Indian accent, selling you dishwashing detergent. Sometimes when things are a bit too quiet, he’ll become Arnold Schwarzenegger discussing with you what kind of car you should purchase.

Just another day with TJ!

Probably my all time favorite “TJ’s humor stories” was when he answered a friend’s phone in just his normal voice and fooled the true salesman on the other end of the line that he, TJ, really was the owner of the home. As the salesman asked each of his questions, TJ found ways to answer honestly but without revealing that he was simply a friend of the family and not really “the man of the household.” He talked with the salesman about how the teenage daughter of the home was always on the phone with her friends, which was true. He went on to say how difficult this was to deal with her being on the phone so much and then asked the caller, “Do you have teenagers? Can you relate to what I’m talking about?” The salesman said he had just the plan for them!

When asked if they ever called long distance, TJ mentioned that they had relatives that lived in Florida and how those calls could go on for quite a long time. The salesman jumped on that and said he had a plan that would include unlimited long distance and would meet their needs. I don’t remember what the exact question from the salesman was, but TJ was finally not able to answer honestly without getting caught in his charades. There was a long pause from the salesman, and then he asked, “You’re really not Mr. ‘Smith,’ are you?” With a chuckle in his voice TJ replied, “No, I’m not.” “Are you eighteen?” “No, I’m not.” Finally the salesman, realizing how well he had been duped by TJ, started to laugh over the whole thing. TJ told the man that he was just a friend of the family and that Mr. “Smith” wasn’t home – but probably would not be interested in the phone plan anyway. I can still see TJ’s face as he related the story to us. He was grinning from ear to ear, loving the whole spoof, and just a bit proud of himself for fooling a very gullible salesman!

TJ’s humor is often simple but very, very funny. And, most of the time, it is well-timed. Just when you need a good laugh or need to have the tension of a rough situation broken, there is TJ with a one-liner, a goofy twist or perspective on whatever is happening, or just a silly response in one of his many voices. Sometimes you don’t want to laugh, and the harder you try to hold it back, the more he will bring it on. He always sees right through you at those moments, and that just encourages him to keep pushing the silliness.

Today TJ posted a video of some soldiers taking a break and having a little bit of fun with a goat. I don’t know if these are troops that TJ serves with in Kuwait. I don’t even know if this event happened in Kuwait. But, I do know that it is exactly the kind of thing that TJ would get involved in if he was around, and he would certainly enjoy the silliness and fun of the moment. (The video is attached below so that you can laugh along with him).

We miss TJ tremendously. When we experience things and times that just seem overwhelming to us, it is often these memories of his silliness that help pull us through. We will say to each other, “remember when TJ did …whatever?” Or, “remember how TJ would say …such-and-such?” And as our thoughts race back to those fun times, in our minds we hear his voice(s) and we see the twinkle in his eyes and the mischievous smile on his face, and, just as if he were here, we begin to laugh once again.

When I think of him being so far away, serving in Kuwait, and I combine that thought with these precious memories, I wonder, which service of his is being more effective? The one where he stands guard at the main gate, checking for bombs underneath incoming vehicles? Or is it the service of laughter that he brings to his fellow soldiers, using that gift of his to break tense moments, or to cheer someone up who is having a bad day?

I love this one-liner from the Old Testament Book of Proverbs, “Laughter does good, like medicine.” TJ has not only been gifted with a great sense of humor and an ability to make others laugh, but he also has the ability to administer it at just the right moment when it can do the most good - just like medicine.

Thank you for keeping us healthy, TJ! We love you, Pal! 

Ram vs. Soldier

The Power of the Pen … Day 59

In some ways our sons are totally different from each other. That much was especially apparent with respect to their individual learning styles during our years of homeschooling both of them. James was very book-oriented, and completed his workbook assignments with little or no trouble. TJ, on the other hand, was a “hands-on” learner and hated his text books. He was forever asking me why he had to learn grammar, or math, or history, or … At times it seemed a constant struggle to get him to complete his assignments. Reading and writing were the two things he seemed to detest the most.

When TJ received his orders to Malmstrom Air Force Base, he was really excited to begin serving. He also wanted to make a difference for the Lord in people’s lives. He became an active witness to those around him. He got involved with the base chapel, playing the drums for the worship team, as well as working with the young people. It was exciting to hear him talk about those to whom and with whom he wanted to minister.

TJ knows how important and powerful prayer is in a believer’s life. He certainly realized it during his weeks in Basic Military Training. So, one day he decided to enlist the prayer support of his family and friends and began writing his “MUM” letters. In his first letter he explained that “MUM” stood for “Malmstrom’s Underground Missionary” and that his real assignment was from the Lord to be a missionary to those on his base. TJ’s letters were not your “normal” one-page prayer letters. His were three and four pages long! I could not believe this was the same child I had fought “tooth and nail” with to get a one page report from, and now he was writing three to four page letters/reports of his service for the Lord.

As TJ continued to take his stand for Christ, he found himself being challenged to defend what he believed. This was not discouraging to him at all, but it challenged him and motivated him to study areas of doctrine in an effort to defend them.

Now, when TJ does something, as I’ve mentioned in past blogs, he ALWAYS gives more than one hundred percent of himself to it. So, when it came to his need to study the doctrinal areas that he was defending, he didn’t just study them. He studied and then wrote papers to defend his belief. And just as he was doing with his MUM letters, his papers were several pages long and also extremely creative. I teased him one day, telling him that his English teacher was thrilled to finally see him completing his writing assignments! (He didn’t think that was too funny.)

The cover of one of TJ's papers.

He has written papers on so-called “faith healers” [“I Command You to be Healed”], on witnessing [“A New Book, Written Each Day”], and on his own struggle with temptation [“The Stalker in My Midst”]. If you’d like to read these, or any of his other papers, you will find them on a site called Lulu, at TJ Lombardi’s Storefront.

We did not hear TJ talk about writing too much during the past year. But, about two weeks ago Joe told me that he had just received another email from TJ with a special attachment. TJ was writing again, and had asked his dad to please proof his newest paper. His current papers are dealing more with some of the things he is experiencing on the base in Kuwait, such as “serving with excellence.” In fact, he recently wrote to say that his most recent article will be published in the base’s newspaper.

There is no doubt in my mind: TJ is a soldier at heart. He loves defending his country and would not hesitate to fire that assault rifle of his if he believed it was warranted. But, I believe TJ also knows that his pen is just as powerful as the rifle that is strapped to his side. With his pen he not only expresses his thoughts, but can also influence others. And now, with the aid of the internet, his words are impacting people around the world. There may come a day when he will lay down his rifle, but I hope he never puts down his pen.

Integrity, Service, Excellence ... Day 49

TJ’s recruiting officer gave TJ pamphlets to study as his time to enter Basic Military Training (BMT/ boot camp) grew closer. This was to get TJ better prepared for the classroom training he would go through during BMT. The recruiter told TJ two of the most important things he should know were the Air Force mission statement and its values. The mission of the United States Air Force is to fly, fight and win … in air, space and cyberspace.  Its values are: Integrity First / Service before Self / Excellence in All We Do.

TJ is very familiar with the idea of having a mission, or goal, and knows that one’s values provide direction to meet that goal. But we never dreamed that the Air Force’s values would mirror so close to those we had instilled within both of our boys while they were growing up. TJ has been taught from his early grade school days that by staying true to God’s Word he could maintain his integrity in all areas of life. He was taught to always put God first, then others, and lastly, himself. And, we taught him that in everything he did, he was always to do his very best (excellence) because whatever he did, he was to do it for the Lord!

During BMT TJ’s flight had several different instructors (drill sergeants) for the first three weeks. Sgt. de la Costa was finally assigned to his flight for the final four. She stood about 5’2” tall, and if you ever saw her in civilian clothing, you probably would never have guessed that she was a boot camp drill sergeant. As the saying goes, NEVER judge a book by its cover – and never underestimate a drill sergeant based upon her size. She instilled more fear into those recruits than I ever imagined possible! She was also the one who put TJ in charge of cleaning the latrine in their dorm. For four long weeks TJ would stay up after all the others had gone to sleep, cleaning the latrine, polishing every piece of chrome until it looked brand new, wiping down all of the walls, washing every mirror making sure there wasn’t even one spot of even the tiniest size on any of them. He even earned the title “Latrine Queen” from his fellow recruits. He would work for two or more hours each night keeping it spotless – excellence.

At BMT graduation TJ showed us the latrine.
This was just the sink area - there was MUCH more!

It wasn’t until the Sunday afternoon of graduation weekend that TJ finally asked Sgt. de la Costa why she left him with that duty the entire time. This was an assignment that is normally given to the recruit who continually gets in trouble and TJ just couldn’t figure out what he had done to deserve this “penalty” for four weeks. She smiled at him and quietly replied, “Lombardi, I knew you were the only one that I could trust to do the job right and keep it clean.” She knew TJ not only knew the three USAF values, but he fleshed them out in EVERYTHING he did.

This past Sunday, September 19^th, Joe and TJ had a chance to instant message with each other. TJ had finished another tough day at one of the main gates. He said he worked really hard, spending much of the day sweeping and shoveling sand out of the gate guardhouse area. He was working to make the place look good. At one point during his shift he was required to give a “post brief.” He explained to Joe that he had to stand at attention and tell the inspector about his post. His Master Sergeant later told TJ that his post brief was probably the best one that he had ever heard. He went on to tell TJ that he has become known throughout the entire chain of command as one of the most outstanding airmen in the entire squadron, and then he encouraged him to keep up the good work. (The problem is that some of his peers don’t appreciate TJ’s excellence because it “shows them up”).

Joe encouraged TJ to continue doing an excellent job, to remain humble, and respectfully remind others that, along with them, he swore to live by the values of integrity, service, and excellence.

TJ’s reply to Joe was, “Hua!” which stands for “Heard, Understood, and Acknowledged!”

TJ not only has heard, understood, and acknowledged the values of the USAF -, he lives by them every single day!

Of course, I am one Very Proud Mom!

Music, Music, Music ... Day 42

TJ grew up with music. It has always filled our house – as far back as June, 1979, when Joe and I were married (some seven years before the day TJ was born). During his pre-school years I would sing to him as part of our bed-time routine. The songs I sang were mostly simple choruses that I had learned at summer camp when I was just a teenager. They spoke of the saving grace of Jesus Christ and the “light” He places within every believer’s heart. One of TJ’s favorite songs was the theme song from that camp. I was always fascinated that he liked a song that spoke of a place which he had never seen. Even more amazing was that several years later, after one major move across the country from the east coast to the “left” coast, and then a second move half-way back again (to Michigan), TJ was finally able to attend that camp!

Making music TJ style!

When he was about four, TJ took an old cornet that had been given to us, and decided he was going to play it. That was another one of those days when he had gotten a bit too quiet - that is until he figured out how to make some kind of noise on it. So, as any “good” parent would do, we made him take piano lessons for a few years in his early grade school days - which he never enjoyed!

When he was about nine or ten we realized what a nice voice he had and how well he stayed on pitch. At this same time, one of our favorite day-off activities was to drive about an hour and a half to a large Christian bookstore. On one such trip, Joe got TJ the back-up tape for one of his favorite songs and shortly thereafter, TJ sang his first solo for a men’s breakfast. TJ never sang just to sing. He always sang from his heart. Every song he ever chose to perform always meant something special to him.  

On April 20, 1999 two seniors at Columbine High School massacred twelve other students and one teacher before killing themselves. Michael W. Smith wrote and performed the song “This is Your Time” at the funeral of one of these murdered students. That particular incident had a profound impact on TJ and Michael W. Smith’s song, “This Is Your Time” became another one of his favorites. To this day, I cannot listen to that song without seeing in my mind TJ singing it. It was as if every fiber of his being joined him as he sang in memory of the Christian students who lost their lives for their faith in Christ.

As his voice began to change during his teenage years and his love for the drums grew [that is another whole blog for another time], TJ’s desire to sing in public faded. But, he has not lost his love of music – far from it! He has simply found new ways to express himself through music. Another one of those ways has been to create musical video/slide shows. Most of these are tributes to the military and they are extremely moving. I have put one of my favorites below. TJ has used Chris Daughtry's song "Home" to pay tribute to his fellow service men and women who have sacrificed so much to serve our country in the foreign lands of Afghanistan and Iraq and look forward to coming home. Because music is an expression to and from the heart, I encourage you to listen to TJ’s heart.